things from Christmas not to forget

• "All done." (Alaina deciding she had already opened too many gifts)
• My midget growling with joy.  Literally, growling.
• Trying to help everyone open their gifts.
• Thinking all the presents were her.s (close, but not quite!)
• Insisting Eva wear the ladybug headband and wings meant for Alaina.
• Needing her Coraline doll with her at all times
• Toasting everyone from a cordial glass (i.e. teeny tiny wine glass)
• "Little bit more, please" x50, asking for more sparkling cider in her fancy "wine" glass.
• Forgoing homemade crazy-delicious lasagna because she ate too many vegetables.
• Using her chopsticks to eat pumpkin bread.

photo op

Just when I think I couldn't possibly love her more, she falls asleep in my silver platform wedges.

christmas!

I've always been a fan of Christmas.  I love hot apple cider, sweaters, decorations, Christmas trees, carols, and traditions.  As I've gotten older, I learned that I love to find perfect gifts for my family.  But this year, THIS YEAR, is even more special.

I get to start teaching my daughter about Christmas.

Yes, this is her third Christmas.  But this is the first Christmas that she understands that something is happening. She recognizes Santa and knows that he brings presents.  She's mesmerized by Christmas lights.  Anytime we leave the house, she says bye-bye to our Christmas tree (and with her toddler speech, it comes out as "BYE, CRIMUSS TWEE!"  It is one of the most adorable things I've ever heard).

She might be a little too young to put out cookies for Santa, or carrots for reindeer.  No Elf on the Shelf here in 2011.  And we're going to skip church this year (you're welcome, fellow parishioners).  But she's starting to understand the magic of the season.

Which has renewed the magic for me immeasurably.

kids say the darndest things

Here's a short list of adorable things my daughter has said recently:

• "Stop that, mama!" "Stop what, baby?" "Being drunk!"
• (watching "The Wizard of Oz" at the point that it switches to color) "Mama!  Not Kansas!"
• "Mama, time out!" (she was suggesting I needed a time out.  What I really needed was for her to stop climbing on me.)

She's the sweetest candy cane on the tree!

too. much. cute.

Picked up yakisoba and teriyaki for dinner tonight.  Alaina asked me to feed her some rice with chopsticks.  After a few bites, she decided to try on her own.  She was surprisingly successful for a two year old, and for a first timer.  Just when I think I can't love her anymore, she does stuff like this. *sound of heart exploding*

That's her Lower Lip of Determination.

My daughter is a constant source of inspiration.  Her willingness to try new things, her perseverance, and her unbridled joy at her successes are amazing.  She teaches me new things everyday.  Even if it's just a new method of controlling my temper!

motherhood: a glimpse into mental illness

"The moment a child is born, the mother is also born.  

She never existed before.  

The woman existed, but the mother, never.  

A mother is something absolutely new."  

~Rajneesh

I didn't anticipate running the gamut of emotions daily when I found out I was going to have a baby.  I expected the sleeplessness, the constant mess, the influx of animated movies into my home, and playing second fiddle for the rest of my life.  But I didn't expect to be constantly overwhelmed.

Being a mother is the most wonderful title I have ever, and will ever, hold.  It is also the most maddening, frustrating, and thankless job I've ever had.  I understand now why some animals eat their young.  I also understand why my own mother "hated" me from ages 12-18....and to be honest, it probably would've lasted longer had I not moved out.  (Of course, she didn't hate me, but my smart mouth and disregard for rules probably is the reason for her high blood pressure today)

I have never felt so accomplished and so worthless.  I have never been more tolerant, and never more unforgiving.  Little things can send me into an hours-long anxiety attack.   Big things can send me into an hours-long anxiety attack.

It's this kind of crazy that I'm so blessed to have in my life.  Thank you, Alaina, for making your mama nuts.

roasted pineapple with spiced whipped cream.

Winter is pineapple season!  I love them, but find raw pineapple to be too acidic to eat comfortably.  Canned pineapple is terrible, too.  But I couldn't resist the siren's call of its spiky green top.  So I bought one, and figured I'd decide what to do with it later.

Enter roasted pineapple with spiced whipped cream.  It's not too sweet, easy to make, and a nice change from winter cobblers and crisps.

This recipe is made infinitely easier if you own a pineapple corer/ringer.

roasted pineapple
1 c. sugar
1 c. white wine (I used apple juice, didn't have wine on hand)
2 tsp. vanilla bean paste  OR
1 vanilla bean pod, scraped and pod & seeds mixed in.
(I'm sure vanilla extract would do just fine)
1 pineapple, peeled, cored, and cut into rings.

Mix sugar, wine, and vanilla in a large bowl.  Add pineapple rings.  Let sit for approximately 20 minutes.
Pour mixture into a glass baking dish, doing your best to make it one layer.  Cover with foil.  Bake at 350 degrees for 30-40 minutes, until syrup is slightly thickened, and pineapple has begun to caramelize on the bottom.

spiced whipped cream
2 c. heavy whipping cream
1/4 c. sugar
1/8 tsp. cinnamon
1/8 tsp. cardamom
1/8 tsp. ginger

For best results, pour whipping cream into metal bowl and chill while pineapple is marinating and cooking.  Whip to soft peaks.  Add sugar and spices.  Whip to firm peaks.

Be sure to plate this with a little of the syrup!  It's a delicious end to a winter meal.

sno-isle co-op.

I am smitten.  I discovered my local co-op a few weeks ago, and I'm literally creating excuses to go.  I love that all the produce is organic AND local.  I love the old building.  I love the classes that are offered, even though I have yet to attend one.  I love that the staff is almost as excited as I am about what I am taking home.

I picked up celeriac (celery root), purple potatoes, salad mix, Fuyu persimmons, Chioggia beets, a sugar pie pumpkin, and some other assorted grocery items.  The co-op is also a great spot to find ethnic foods that the local grocery store might not have.  While I love PCC, Whole Foods, Central Market, etc, I still feel like I'm in a store.  At Sno-Isle Co-Op, I sort of feel like I'm poking through a friend's kitchen.

Their bulk section is awesome, they have the whole gamut of personal and home care products, and all sorts of neat handmade goodies, too.  You can check them out here:  http://www.snoislefoods.coop/

menu!

I plan out my meals about a week in advance.  I like knowing what to expect.  I dislike getting halfway through a meal preparation and realizing I'm short an ingredient.  I like being able to balance our diets over several days, rather than focusing on each meal.  I dislike spending too much money, especially for food items that spoil.

For me, planning a menu for the week is a wonderful thing.  I get to research new recipes, organize my cupboards, and plan on nourishing my daughter and myself.

This week, I'm planning on: vegetarian supper plate (sort of like a Spanish style ratatouille), broccoli and brown rice casserole, split pea soup with homemade bread, and ground bison stroganoff.

What are you making?

how to cook bacon naked.

Traditional methods of cooking bacon involve splattering grease.  If you're a fan of cooking naked, bacon should be off the table.  Until now.

**For the record, I'm not a fan of naked cooking.  Or being naked in general.  I'm not judging if you are, it's just not my thing.

You will need a cookie sheet.  An oven.  Bacon.  Parchment paper, if you're fancy.

Lay out bacon onto cookie sheet (line with parchment first, fancy folks!).  Place bacon in COLD oven.  Set temperature to 400 degrees Fahrenheit (that's 447.444 Kelvin) and set timer for 17 minutes.  Walk away.
Check bacon when timer dings.  Continue cooking if you like, or remove from oven (Carefully!  You're naked and now you've got a platter full of grease!).  Transfer bacon to paper towel-lined plate.  Do what you want with the grease, just don't put it down the drain.

You can enjoy while it's hot, or be like me: put it in a container to enjoy all week.  Pro.

lentil bread

Fresh out of the oven!

Going through my pantry last night, I came across 3 bags of lentils.  THREE WHOLE POUNDS OF LENTILS.  Don't get me wrong, I love a good lentil soup or summer salad, but a little variety never hurts.  And I was out of homemade bread, so I began wondering: what would happen if I put lentils in bread?

The answer: MAGIC.  Magic happens when you put lentils in bread.

Lentils are a great source of protein, fiber, iron, folate, vitamin B, amino acids, and minerals.  Not to mention they're cheap and delicious.

Fairly straightforward recipe.  Makes delicious toast and sandwich bread.

lentil bread
1/2 c. lentils (I used brown, but I think any would be good)
2 cups warm water, divided
2 1/4 tsp. yeast (or one packet)
2 tsp. sugar
1 tsp. salt
1 egg, lightly beaten
2 c. whole wheat flour
3.5-4 c. bread flour (I'm sure all purpose would be fine)

Soak lentils in one cup of water overnight.

Add additional cup of water (be sure it's WARM!), sugar, and yeast to lentils.  Let sit 15 minutes.

Mix egg and salt in large mixing bowl.  Add lentil mixture.  Stir gently.  Add flours, incorporate to form dough.  Turn onto floured surface and knead 5-10 minutes.  Place in oiled bowl and let rise, about 60 minutes.

Divide into two loaves and shape.  You can do round loaves on a cookie sheets, but I prefer just using my loaf pans....easier for toast.  Grease the pans just a bit.  Let rise until doubled in size (about an hour).  Bake at 375 for 50 minutes.  Let cool in pans covered with a towel.  Keeping the loaves covered will prevent the lentils from hardening.

Good, and good for you!  Happy baking!

domesticity

Last night, I started a new crochet project, put black beans down to soak, prepped lentils for bread, planned today's breakfast, and read a silly grocery store checkout magazine (not the gossipy kind, the housewifey kind).

Today's list includes cook beans, make bread, read other silly magazine, plan menus through next Thursday, work on crochet project more, grocery shopping, and trip to the craft store.

And I will do this all with a clever, capable, and beautiful two year old dynamo at my side.  I am so blessed!

zucchini and carrot muffins

My daughter is OBSESSED with cupcakes.  Fortunately, she doesn't really register a difference between muffins and cupcakes.  


In between grocery store trips, I found myself with a zucchini, a nearly full bag of mini carrots, and no ready-to-go snack foods.  Muffins seemed pretty logical.  This recipe would probably work as a quick bread, but that's not nearly as manageable or fun for a two year old.


As written, this recipe makes 12 small or 20 mini muffins.  I double it, mostly because I have a need to share what I cook.


zucchini and carrot muffins

• 1/2 cup sugar
• 2 tablespoons canola oil
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 large egg
• 1 cup grated zucchini
• 1 cup grated carrots (the food processor is great for this if you're using baby carrots)
• 1/4 cup chopped nuts (I prefer hazelnuts, but whatever you like)
• 1 cup all purpose flour
• 1 teaspoon baking powder
• 1 teaspoon cinnamon
• 1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg

1. Preheat the oven to 375°F. Line 12 cups of a standard muffin tin (or 20 mini-muffin cups) with papers, or grease each cup.
2. Whisk together the sugar, oil, salt, and egg.
3. Add the zucchini, carrots,  and nuts.
4. Whisk together the remaining ingredients in a separate bowl, then add to the batter. Stir till just combined.
5. Divide the batter evenly among the prepared muffin cups. Let the muffins rest for 10 minutes before placing them into the oven.
6. Bake the muffins until the edges are lightly browned and they feel firm if gently pressed, about 18 to 25 minutes for the regular sized muffins (about 10 minutes for the minis).  A cake tester inserted into the center of a muffin should come out clean.
7. Remove the muffins from the oven, and cool them in the pan for 10 minutes; transfer to a rack, and cool. 

So good!  And a great way to sneak in extra veggies.  I'm a clever mama.

boiled blueberry muffins

Yes, I know: they sound bizarre.  But they are good.  And even better, they are good for you.  If you are a fan of muffins that are more like unfrosted cupcakes, these are not for you.  Don't get me wrong, I love those kind of muffins.  Problem is, if I make them, I eat them.  So I figured I'd make muffins I wouldn't feel guilty about polishing off.

The original recipe calls for raisins and only whole wheat flour.  Alaina ADORES blueberries, and I had just picked up a large quantity of dried blueberries (thanks, Winco!), so I used those instead.  I also used flax meal and buckwheat flour in addition to whole wheat flour.  Go grains!

boiled blueberry muffins


1 1/2 c. dried blueberries (or other dried fruit of your choice....I would cut larger fruits [apricots, cherries, etc.] to raisin size)
1 1/2 c. water
1/2 c. honey (or agave nectar)
1/2 c. butter

Bring the above ingredients to boil.  Simmer for two minutes.  Remove from heat and let sit for about an hour.
In the meantime:

1 c. whole wheat flour
1/3 c. buckwheat flour
1/3 c. flax meal
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. baking soda

Sift above ingredients.  Discard flax meal that won't sift nicely.  Flours you use are of importance only to you....you're just aiming for about 1 1/2 cups worth.  Add fruit mixture to this bowl and:

1 egg
1 tsp. vanilla

Mix well.  It will look hideous.  And smell a little funny, too.  Fill muffin cups.  Should make about 1 dozen muffins.  Bake in 400 degree oven for about 15 minutes.  Toothpick should come out clean, unless you stabbed a berry.

I think I'll try cherries next time, and substitute almond meal for flax, and almond extract for vanilla.  That's the blessing and the curse of cooking: each new project leads to many more ideas!

it's only been 5 months!

Clearly, I'm a lackadaisical blog updater.  I will do my best to fix this.

New home, new job, delay in school.  The times, they are a-changin'.  My daughter gets cuter, smarter, and more capable every minute.  I'm afraid to let her sleep, because she changes so quickly, I'm not sure who's going to wake up.

Lots of wonderful food projects on the horizon....I will post them as I make them!  I'm sure my Facebook friends are tired of seeing the photos.

birthday

On Thursday, I'll celebrate my 29th year.  I'm looking forward to it, and not just because I suckered my dad into making potato salad (might not sound like a big deal to you, but it is LITERALLY my favorite food, and I would eat it every day if it weren't such a pain to make).  But I am truly celebrating my last year of my second decade.  I'm enjoying the person I'm growing into, I am loving learning how to be a mom, and I'm cherishing the way the relationships I hold dear have grown.

Not to mention the loot.  Birthday loot is almost as good as Christmas loot.

winning. a contest, that is.

I want more followers of liliesandpoppies.  I'm selfish like that.

So I'm holding a contest.  Once we hit 50 followers, I'll hold a raffle for a meal or baked goods.

Pleasepleaseplease, tell your friends.  Get us to 50, and maybe you can be the proud new owner of an almond cheesecake, lemon cupcakes, or a few loaves of artisan bread!

sarah kay "if i should have a daughter"

I hope that I can be this eloquent when it's Alaina's turn to listen.  Her words are poignant, funny, and full of grace.

sur la table dutch oven

I got an enameled cast iron dutch oven for Christmas.  It's from Sur La Table, and it's a beautiful burgundy color.  Always knew I wanted one, but didn't realize how much I would really use it.  Artisan breads, stews, and roasts all turn out perfectly.  It's easy to clean, and it's pretty.  On average, I'm tossing that bad boy in the oven every 3 days or so....okay, not tossing, 'cause it is HEAVY, but you get the idea.  


It might be an investment (even on the low price point end, they'll still set you back about $100), but if taken care of properly, they'll last forever.  I highly recommend the Sur La Table brand (Le Crueset comes in pretty colors, I covet everything they make in orange, but I hear the quality is comparable to the one I own).  Can't wait to add the smaller ones to my collection!

roast chicken

I love roast chicken.  It's simple, healthy, and provides about 3 meals or more in my house.  I've tried lots of methods, but the one below is my favorite.

simple roast chicken

Preheat the oven to 450 degrees.


Rinse a whole chicken under cold water after removing any giblets from the cavity.  Pat dry with paper towels, being sure to dry the interior of the chicken as well.


Place chicken in pan (I use a ceramic casserole dish).  Season with Kosher salt and pepper.  DON'T DO ANYTHING ELSE.  You want to avoid moisture...so adding garlic, oil, lemon, or fresh herbs isn't doing the chicken any favors.  The high heat and lack of moisture will crisp the skin quickly, sealing in the chicken's natural juices.


Place in oven, and cook until internal temperature reaches 165 degrees (about 50 to 60 minutes for a 3-4 lb. bird).  Leave it alone while it's in there, no basting, and no checking until at least 45 minutes.  You can baste the chicken with it's own juices immediately after you take it out of the oven.  But that's it.  Chicken's done.  


If you're feeling fancy,  melt a couple  tablespoons of butter, mix with Dijon mustard and tarragon for a nice dipping sauce for your perfectly cooked bites of chicken.




This recipe puts those grocery store rotisserie chickens to shame.  Not to mention those chickens are FULL of fat.  I shred the leftover meat for salads, quesadillas, sandwiches, whatever.

growing up

As I enter new chapters, I am forced to say good-bye to certain people in my life.  Sometimes, cutting these ties feels liberating.  Sometimes, I'm disappointed that they're not growing and changing with me.  It's a bittersweet ending: I'm motivated to be achieving my goals, and it can be sad that friends who were so supportive of me in the past can't stick by me in this new phase.

But every time, I'm grateful for the time I had with them, and I'm excited for the new relationships to come.  Occasionally, I even get the chance to reconnect with people because our paths have become more similar as time as marched forward.

To those who I've said good-bye to recently: thank you for the memories.  Thank you for the laughter.  And thank you for holding my hand when I needed a little extra stability.  Hopefully, I'll see you again soon.

jill scott's "golden"...my anthem

I love this song, and have since the moment I heard it.  What a wonderful reminder that you are in control of your outlook on life.  Plus, it sounds wonderful on your car stereo when it's sunny outside!

coconut banana bread

I'm not a huge fan of banana bread.  There, I said it.  I know it makes me some sort of quick-bread pariah.  But I hate waste, so I put overripe bananas in the freezer thinking "Someday, I'll find a banana bread recipe I like."  This is the closest I've gotten so far.  Feel free to adjust the amount of cardamom vs. cinnamon.   I prefer cardamom, as indicated below.

coconut milk banana bread

2 1/2 cups all purpose flour

2 teaspoons baking powder

1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1 teaspoon cardamom

1/2 teaspoon salt

2 eggs

1 cup granulated sugar

1 cup dessicated coconut, unsweetened

3 mashed bananas (large)

1/2 cup coconut milk

2 Tbsp butter, melted and cooled

2 Tbsp unsweetened applesauce

1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Lightly grease a loaf pan.

In a medium bowl, sift together flour, baking powder, cinnamon, cardamom & salt

In a separate large bowl, whisk eggs, sugar, and coconut flakes until combined. Whisk in bananas, coconut milk, butter, applesauce and vanilla.

Slowly add flour mixture to wet ingredients and stir with a spatula until just combined.

Pour batter into loaf pan and bake for 60 minutes or until a toothpick entered into the center of the loaf comes out clean.    **My oven took almost 90 minutes!

mac and cheese monday

I plan my meals out a week in advance.  Yes, it's a little obsessive-compulsive and nerdy.  But I can't tell you the last time I had to run to the grocery store during peak hours because I needed something that night to make dinner.  It also has cut down the amount of money I spend on groceries because I've eliminated (or at least cut down) the impulse purchases since I'm shopping from a list.


Tonight, I'm making macaroni and cheese with ham and asparagus...definitely a favorite of mine!  Alaina gobbles the stuff down, too.  


monday macaroni recipe

• 1 pound pasta (I use spirals)
• 1 bunch asparagus
• 3 tablespoons butter
• 3 tablespoons flour
• 1 cup chicken broth
• 2 cups milk
• 2 tablespoons hot sauce (or more to taste...I'm cooking for tiny tastebuds!)
• 3 tablespoons Dijon mustard
• 1 cup white cheddar cheese, grated
• 1 cup Gruyere cheese, grated
• 1 lb. chopped ham (great way to use up Easter leftovers!)
• • 2 handfuls shredded parmesan
• • 
    
• 
  

  Begin cooking pasta according to package directions.

  
  

  Snap off the woody stems of the asparagus by holding the spears at each end and bending them. Cut the asparagus spears in half so they are about the size of the noodle. When the pasta has about 2-3 minutes left of cooking time, add the asparagus and cook along with the pasta.

  
  

  While the pasta and asparagus are cooking, heat a medium-size skillet over medium heat and add the butter. When the butter melts, add the flour and cook about a minute. Whisk in the stock, milk, hot sauce and Dijon, and bring to a bubble, stirring frequently, until the liquid thickens slightly. Remove from heat and stir the cheddar, gruyere and one handful parmesan.  Fold in the ham.  

  
  

  Drain cooked pasta and asparagus well and combine with the cheese sauce. Turn the mixture out into a casserole dish then top with remaining parmesan. Transfer to the oven and place under the broiler to brown the cheese.

  
  

  ** This is easy to make in one pot, if you start the cheese sauce after you drain the pasta/asparagus, and use the pasta pot for your sauce.  Will take a bit longer that way, but you'll save time on dishes later.

  
  

  
  

  The leftovers are fantastic, and it's a great kid-friendly dish that's a step up from the usual.  And asparagus is in season....well, almost.

  
  

  
  

so grateful

It's snowing outside my window, the dryer is humming, the baby is sleeping, and I have a huevos rancheros casserole in the fridge waiting for the oven at dinner time.

I'm warm and dry, my fridge, freezer, and pantry are stocked, and I'm in reasonably good health.

I have the most incredible family and friends a girl could ask for.  My daughter is brilliant and funny, and brings me more joy than I knew a human heart could contain.

It is a freakin' good day to be me.

fresh artisan bread

I don't know about you, but I'm a total sucker for really good bread.  Those crusty, herbed loaves that perfectly compliment homemade pastas and awesome salads, or just round out an amazing breakfast.

Artisan bread is generally fewer than 6 ingredients, and relies on a fermentation process to supplement the small amount of yeast that is added.  Usually baked in clay ovens, the home baker can make use of a cast iron dutch oven to achieve spectacular results.

The basic recipe couldn't be easier.

artisan bread base
3 cups flour
1 3/4 tbsp. salt
1 tsp. yeast
1 1/2 cups water


Blend dry ingredients.  Add water.  Mix to form a shaggy dough.  Cover with plastic wrap (I have a designated plastic bowl with a lid that I use for my bread) and let sit overnight.


Preheat oven to 450 degrees.  When it's ready, place cast iron dutch oven with lid in the oven, and let it heat for 30 minutes.  While it's heating, empty dough onto heavily floured surface.  Coat bread with flour by turning it several times, and shape into desired form.  Cover with plastic wrap and let it rest while your cast iron is heating.  After 30 minutes, put dough into dutch oven (I like to line the bottom with parchment, just in case) with the lid in place.  Let bake 30 minutes, then remove lid.  Bake 15 additional minutes.  Bread is done with it sounds hollow with a tap to the bottom of the loaf.


But what about fun ingredients?  What about those delicious rosemary scented loaves at the grocery store?

Not a problem.

Just add the fun ingredients.  If they're dry ingredients, add them when you're mixing the dry ingredients.  If they're wet ingredients (like the sundried tomato and pesto loaf I made last week), mix them into the water before you add it to the flour mixture.  With additional wet ingredients, you may need to increase cooking time slightly.

I've done some awesome combinations: lavender and herb, almond and ginger, lemon and rosemary.  I love just making plain loaves, too....really makes INCREDIBLE sandwiches.  Grilled cheese will never be the same.

Let me know what you create!

adventures in financial aid

I'm going back to school.  My plan is to earn an associate's degree in nutrition, and parlay that into a bachelors.  Ultimate goal?  Become a registered dietitian.  I'd love to go to culinary school, and play with food all day long.  But that is an extraordinarily difficult path as a single mom, and even more difficult in the current state of the economy and job force.

Because of the time period in which I started the application process, I've had to fill out the FAFSA twice.  The application for federal financial aid itself isn't that difficult.  It's the little addendum paperwork required by the school that adds up....especially since I'm having to submit it a second time.  However, the staff in the financial aid office of Everett Community College has been exceedingly helpful and polite, and the admissions staff as well.

It's such an awesome feeling to have a long-term goal in place, and to be starting the process.  Slow and steady wins the race!

are you ready to have children?

Mess Test
Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flowerbed and rub on the walls. Cover the stains with crayons. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.

Toy Test
Obtain a 55-gallon box of Lego's. (If Lego's are not available, you may substitute roofing tacks or broken bottles.) Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream. (This could wake a child at night.)

Feeding Test
Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a stout cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios) into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug on the floor.

Dressing Test
Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all arms stay inside.

Grocery Store Test
Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop at the grocery store. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.

Night Test
Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8 - 12 pounds of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 8:00 P.M. begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9:00 P.M. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10:00 P.M. Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these too until 4:00 A.M. Set alarm for 5:00 A.M. Get up and make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.

Physical Test (Women)
Obtain a large beanbag chair and attach it to the front of your clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10 of the beans.

Physical Test (Men)
Go to the nearest drug store. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time.

Final Assignment
Find a couple who already has a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training, and child's table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run riot. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you will have all the answers.

homemade granola

I love granola!  Skip the milk, just add some yogurt, and my breakfast is ready.  The last time I went looking for it in the cereal aisle, I was disappointed.  I like raisins, but it seems like there should be more options.  So I decided to make it myself.  I use a basic recipe, and play from there.  The current batch Alaina and I are eating has dried cherries, dessicated coconut (not the sweetened shreds, it's unsweetened and much smaller flakes), and slivered almonds.  Take advantage of the bulk food and/or natural food section of your grocery store.  I think I'll play around with dried mango and ginger in my next batch!


Basic Recipe
2 cups rolled oats
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
1/4 cup honey
1/4 cup firmly packed light brown sugar
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract


Combine brown sugar, vanilla, and vegetable oil (I don't recommend olive oil, unless you are a HUGE fan of the taste) thoroughly.  It will have the consistency of paste.  If you want to add spices (cinnamon, cardamom, nutmeg, etc.), this is a great time.  Add the oats on top, and mix well.  Get your hands dirty!  You want every piece of oatmeal coated.  Spread mixture on a parchment lined baking sheet.  You want to keep some of the texture, but you still need bite-sizeable pieces.  Put in a preheated 325 degree oven, and bake for 15 minutes.  After 10 minutes, flip granola using a spatula.  If using nuts, add here (unless they're already toasted).  Bake for 10 more minutes.  Let cool on the baking sheet.  Top with your choice of dried fruit or other toppings that can't go in the oven (chocolate chips might be an awesome addition!).  Will keep for a week in an airtight container.

a new blog for a new chapter

I started a blog about being a stay at home mom.  And now, over a year later, I realize I had myself pigeonholed.  Sure, I'm a mom first.  But I'm also a daughter, a sister, a friend, and a student.  Not to mention a reader, a cook, a girl who loves to make people laugh, a karaoke rockstar, and a good steward of the Earth.

The title of this blog comes from the flowers that represent the month I was born in (May, Lily of the Valley) and the month my daughter was born in (August, the poppy).  I think flowers are a wonderful reminder that, no matter how humble the beginning, we can always grow into something glorious.